Of Chaos and Peace

Now and then I come to a point when I'm so busy that I don't get time to write for my blog, let alone the half dozen books I'm working on, my journal, and the many people I write letters to.  I love to write.  It's that simple.  But this is the first time this week that I've had a chance to sit down and write up a post that really reflects what I've been thinking lately. 

We started school this week, tackling the Geometry, Writing, and Spanish books like they're the worst challenge we'll ever face.  As I sit here, with a cup of green tea in front of me and the impending notion that I really need to work on my Spanish course, I'm beginning to find an old truth, and make it into a new one. 

The truth is this simple: everything will be done in its proper time.  Life will go on whether I do my Spanish lesson today or get in two tomorrow instead.  And sometimes other things are more important than a Spanish lesson or math homework.  This truth has been widely spread since the book of Ecclesiastes was written, but the modern world seems to have forgotten it in the meaningless busyness and bustle of our daily schedules. 

Moving back to a big city, I've noticed once again the hectic lifestyle modern American people live.  We need to go, go, go, and do, do, do.  Nothing can satisfy our desires better than to see the products of our efforts.  We need to continuously surpass each other in our accomplishments, and put ourselves as high up in the "caste system" as we can before we die.  But in reality, that's not what life's about. 

Life is about living.  To the best of your ability.  Not to become the most influential American of all times, or a well-known and famous inventor, or the millionaire of the century.  Our job here on earth is to live up to God's standards—to use our time wisely.  Not to build ourselves up, but to encourage and strengthen others in the faith.  And if the Spanish book waits a day in order to fulfill that job, the world is not going to end.

So many times we get caught up in the wiles of the world, sure that we need to "go above and beyond" and become the "top man," when all that we really need to do is live our lives to the fullest extent that God wants us to live our lives to.  To become the best is the world's way, and we are called to be a light to the world, not to become part of it.  This doesn't mean that you need to stop working hard, or quit trying to become good at something.  It just means that your top priority should not be to "look good" in the world's eyes.  Being the best and brightest, the top in your particular field, isn't always the adventure that the Lord is choosing to send you on.  Sometimes we simply need to live slowly, quietly, so we can impart peace in the chaos of this world. 

And that's the truth I relearned today.

Iowa Pictures

Now that Iowa is behind me, and the mountains in front, I thought it would be good to browse through the many pictures of the plains and hills.  These are some of my favorite pictures of the beautiful landscape of Eastern Iowa. 

Burdened? (Part 1)

The four youngest are now in bed and the house is quiet enough for me to get some well-deserved writing in.  The last few days, my life has been so busy that I'm wondering once again if this is simply a dream—you know, the kind you wake up from and instead of being the hectic life you remember, it's calm, peaceful, and you're able to do all you want.  But when I got smacked in the face by a sleepy Isaiah hand, I knew that I wasn't dreaming.  This life is real.  And I need to start living it like it is.

I said that my life has been busy.  What I meant by that is that instead of simply doing school work, household chores, and helping my mom out with dinner a little bit, I've been doing school work, household chores, making  dinner, putting the four youngest (Sophia, Emily, Sam, and Isaiah) in bed, and not getting in bed myself until eleven or twelve.  Now, I'm not Cinderella—my mom's not expecting me to do all this every day.  And to be perfectly honest, this is a "scattered" idea of what my days have been like.  I don't always do all the before mentioned things every single day.  But I have been striving toward that kind of responsibility, and I've been learning that when you strive toward such a large amount of responsibility, it's not uncommon to have your hands full.  And only the LORD knows right now how full my hands have been.

I was reading my Bible today and came across the verse in Matthew that says, "Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.  Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gently and humble in heart, and you will find rest for you r souls.  For my yoke is easy and my burden is light." (Matthew 11:28-30, NIV)  This verse kind of jumped out of the paper and hit me, flat in the center of my very tired and stressed brain.  I'm weary right now.  I got home from working six days a week in a kitchen at a Christian summer camp (and trust me, it's an exhausting job!) only to see my dad off on his way to Colorado to begin his new job and realize that the next couple months would be just as exhausting as the last few had been—if not more so.  It's a daunting task to move from state to state, especially when there are five younger kids at home and your mom's pregnant.  So when my dad left Iowa about a month ago, I knew that life wasn't exactly going to be a piece of cake, but I don't think that I expected to be this worn down and well—burdened—about it.  This move is hard on me because I had the false impression that I was rooted in Iowa for at least the next year and a half.  I had wanted to graduate in the same place I started high school... but you know, sometimes God has different plans.

Right now I'm discovering that His plans are the same as my plans... but only if I keep my eyes on Him.

To be continued in part 2.